Twisting the Chain

I'm home from pseudo-Hell (work) and not feeling 100%. Still no texts apart from my friend G. Why? What did I do? I'm just about keeping myself together (like a half-starved Alsatian straining against a lead to get to a juicy steak - trying to restrain myself from exhibiting unattractively clingy behaviour, but struggling) but it's not easy. G. said don't give up as it's only been a day, but I think he's gone. I've been dumped like this before, around 11 months ago, so at least if it is what I think it is (but Gods, I hope it isn't) I'm just a little prepared for it. Wish there was a way to be absolutely certain what was going on, but there's not, so will just have to sit here and stew until reality dawns on me. Then try to forget.
He's doing 9 - 5pm next week, so even if he does text me again it might make it a bit difficult. Don't know what hours I'm working next week, but I'm dreading looking at the off-duty to find out, which I will have to do tomorrow. I always dread looking at it, as I always seem to get shitty hours like all the night shifts, which I hate with a burning vengeance. At least I should have Friday free, not that I've got anything to do as the art group has had to be cancelled. I'll probably just end up doing nothing all day. Wednesday is the only day I'd kill to have off, as I could go to the youth group/art group and then go riding later on.